Category: Prayer

Let Go…

We’ve all heard that sage piece of advise…we’ve probably used it ourselves, to help someone working through difficult times. But what does it really mean to us? Often, when I’m fretting about something, I tell myself to ‘let go and let God.’ But do I really do that? Do you?

It occurred to me recently, that I’m very selective about what I turn over to God. ‘It’s ok,’ I might as well be saying, ‘I’ve got it now, I can take it from here.’ Really? When I’ve got my head on straight, I realize that God does not do things in half measures, but you know what? He’s not going to argue about it. ‘You’ve got it? Fine, go for it,’ is how I imagine him replying (probably with the tiniest smirk). We’re like children, aren’t we, thinking we can do everything ourselves. Picture a child carrying something far too heavy for their size and stature. They’re stubborn though, insisting they’re big enough to carry their load…until the overwhelming weight of the thing stops them dead in their tracks, forcing them to admit defeat. That’s us! And it’s laughable, the way we think we can do everything for ourselves. But, just as we are, or were, with our own children, God is patient with us. Waiting for us to turn our minds and hearts back to him. He’s there, always, to pick up the pieces and set us straight, once again.

So why fret? Why struggle? Why can’t we just let go…and let God direct the course of events with which we’ve been wrestling? It goes along the same lines as the way we pray. We pray for this and we pray for that, very specifically, instead of praying for the strength and courage to accept and follow God’s will.

“Act as if everything depended on you; trust as if everything depended on God,” said Saint Ignatius of Loyola. Wouldn’t it just be so easy, uncomplicated and freeing to let God pilot our course? I say this as if it’s the way I live my life. Oh if that were true. I will reiterate…I’m selective about what I let God pilot, and even then, I want to be co-pilot! This is why prayer is essential to our wellbeing. It centers us, puts us back on the right track with our Lord and helps us to see the bigger picture. So, let’s think twice before we go to sit in that driver’s seat (so to speak) and defer to the one who truly is in control at all times. We just might enjoy the ride.

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The Nature of Things

The heavens are telling the glory of God

And all creation is shouting for joy.

Come dance in the forest, come play in the fields

And sing, sing to the glory of the Lord.

My heart was bursting with this hymn the other morning on my run. The sky was azure blue, birds’ song filled the air, the temperature was perfect.

If only every day was like that. Then there are those ‘why me, Lord?’ kind of days that go downhill from breakfast, or the morning commute. Life can get pretty hectic, chaotic even. We get tired and grouchy and we just want the world to stop. That’s a natural reaction to a day gone wrong. But that’s exactly the time to turn to others; concentrate on the needs of others. If we would just open our eyes and look around us, we’d see family members, friends, and acquaintances struggling with far greater concerns. Some are plagued with money troubles, others marital difficulties and then there are those with life-threatening illnesses – some are facing many of these things all at once. We have all been witness to those who have endured one trial after another and we wonder how they do it. How do they go on, stay sane, maintain their dignity, hold their heads high?

There’s an age-old expression that tells us God never gives us more than he feels we can handle. This is actually believed to be a twisted paraphrasing of 1 Corinthians 10:13. “No testing has overtaken you that is not common to everyone. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tested beyond your strength, but with the testing he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to endure it.”

Sadly, some can’t endure it. They are struck down and never seem to recover. Then there are those who bounce back, get up on their feet again and again, ever moving forward. They are truly blessed because they know that God will not test them beyond their strength; they trust that their burdens are not unlike others and God will help them through, he will provide them with a way out. They know love. Surely, I could not deal with all they’re going through, we say to ourselves. But we could. We have. We are those people – when we trust in the love that is God…and sing – sing to the glory of the Lord.

Catholic Lent Patience Prayer Uncategorized

Try Something New

I like to keep my life in balance – mind, body, spirit and I am grateful to God every day for the ability to practice those things that keep it so. You can imagine, then, how out of balance I felt recently, when a serious fall derailed my running for a month. I moped about for a while, bought a workout video, to keep moving until I could run again…then I stopped to consider…maybe it’s not just the inability to run that’s put me out of balance. Maybe it’s time to look more deeply into my other practices, to see what else might be off kilter.

Do you ever find that, every now and then, your prayer life switches to auto-pilot? You’re going along, going through the motions, but really getting nowhere? Fortunately, Lent comes along just in the nick of time. Lent is a call to conversion; its calls us to wake up, shake off the winter lethargy and get to work.

The great thing about a new routine is the enthusiasm and renewed energy it brings with it. The workout video I purchased was just what I needed – a change of routine; and it got my looking into other routine changes in other areas of my life.

I began to seek out new reflections and meditations to better aid me in reading the daily scriptures. It got me searching for new prayers that will lead me into deeper contemplation. I’m even looking critically at my usual Lenten routines to see how I might do better, how I might make it a more meaningful and fruitful Lenten journey.

Do you give things up for Lent? Is there a purpose to it, a spiritual benefit? Not a ‘what’s in it for me,’ but ‘what’s in it for others?’ This year I’ve decided that everything I do, or refrain from doing; everything I say, or refrain from saying, will be done for the sake of others; for the wellbeing of others. As I write this I’m thinking my husband might be the greatest beneficiary of all my Lenten promises, but that’s really not a bad thing, is it?

Let’s shake things up this Lent, let’s get creative for the benefit of others. Let’s fast – from anger, from hurtful gossip, from impatience. Let’s give generously – of our time, our abundance; let’s give smiles and compliments and kind words and hugs. Let’s pray without ceasing – as we drive, walk, prepare dinner, clean the house. Try something new this Lent, shake things up and it will bring new enthusiasm to your spiritual practices, I guarantee it.

Tags Catholic, Lent

Catholic coping Faith family Humor love Prayer

Once a Mother…

As a mother with young children, I would often ponder Mary, the Mother of God. Did she have days of exhaustion and frustration chasing after her toddler? When he hit the terrible 2s, how did she deal with that? If he was slightly defiant at 12, what was her son like as a teenager? ‘I don’t care if you are the son of God – you clean up this room!’ It often helped me to cope, picturing our Blessed Mother enduring the same trials of motherhood. I know, I know, hers was the incarnate son of God, but, as a teenager…it’s possible there were parental struggles. I clung to that, anyway.

One of my favorite stories of Mary, is that of the wedding feast, when she tells the steward to, ‘do whatever he tells you to do.’ I can almost picture Jesus rolling his eyes. “Mom.” He was a grown man and there was his mother, situated in the midst of his personal life. I have tried my best to avoid being obtrusive in my sons’ lives. But when situations arise whereupon a mother is sought, well, I’m like that obnoxious kid in class, arm waving frantically in the air – pick me, pick me!

A few weeks ago, I had my pre-Christmas weekend all planned – finishing up my Christmas projects and shopping. A call from my daughter-in-law changed all that. Now, granted, I was called because her mother is wintering in Mexico, but let’s not split hairs – I was called. I was needed.

It happened that my son was in the hospital (I hope I would have been called first, regardless of where her mother was, but I dare not assume). Thankfully, it was not a serious illness, though it was a debilitating one and he was hospitalized for two nights. As his wife flitted from hospital to home, I was the constant for my one year old grandson.

When your child is going through a difficult time, no matter his age, you worry. Again, picture our Blessed Mother and all that she had to endure, with all that Jesus had to endure. Ponder that when times are tough. As Jesus suffered, so did his Mother. It matters not, the age of our children – they are our children. When they are sick, when they are suffering, we suffer too.

One of the constants we as Catholics have in our lives, is Mary, the Mother of God – intercessor for us all. As our kids turn to us when they need help – let us then turn to our eternal Mother. Mary, Holy Mother of God, pray for us.

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Lessons Learned

I am my mother’s daughter. My family will sometimes call me T. Way, when I sound or act like my dad – worrying about everything. But I am very much like my mother too. She had numerous admirable qualities, making the raising of seven children appear effortless. Unfortunately, those qualities I did not inherit.

If you were sick, in a household of nine, on a busy school morning, you got short shrift. Mother didn’t spend a lot of time fussing over you. In later years, when she got cancer, most of her friends didn’t know. Never knew about the weeks and weeks of radiation treatments. She continued going to meetings and offering to help on various committees. My sister Patti was truly mother’s daughter, working fulltime through her cancer treatments up until the last few months before she died.

These women taught me that sickness is not something to be pitied or rued. So what am I supposed to do with a man cold? Seriously, I grew up in an unsympathetic household in which sickness was no big deal. So, when my sweet, affable husband turns into a different being entirely, how am I supposed to react? It has always mystified me, for we have been here many times before.

All the day long, never stirring from the bed, then thrashing the sheets and blankets off at 3:00 in the morning, turning on lights, coughing and hacking his way to the bathroom, coming back and falling into bed, wheezing with ragged breaths, too exhausted to care or notice that all the lights have been left on. I get up, rearrange the sheets and blankets, and turn out the lights. Is this done in saintly fashion? Heavens no! It’s more than mild annoyance that propels me out of bed to set things straight. Then I lie there at 3:00 in the morning – wide awake and fuming.

What’s the lesson here? I know there’s a lesson to be learned. I know God is smiling, trying so hard not to laugh – at me…at us. My silent annoyance begins to fade and I too smile. One thing God has blessed me with and for which I am eternally grateful, is a healthy sense of humor. It has carried me through almost 40 years of marriage – and marriage, as we all know, can try the patience of a saint. Though, what saints have and what I sorely lack is patience. God tests me on this attribute (or lack thereof) often. It’s a daily struggle for me, though it is often an easier hurdle to overcome at any other time of the day.3:00 in the morning is really pushing it!

But, let’s look on the bright side – 3:00 am is an ideal time to have a chat with God, who will always calm us down and set us back on the right path. (And that path for me, to the relief of many, has never included a career in nursing.)

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Time for a Change

Look back, way back, to Christmases past. Do you have fond memories of Christmases that you share with your children, your grandchildren? Was last Christmas like those of, say 20 years ago? Of course not. Why? Because things change, situations change…and we adapt.

When my sons were in their teens, I told them they would never have to race around the country side on Christmas day, rushing to visit in-laws and us all in one day. That was something we never had to do and I told them I would not subject them to it. They stared at me blankly at the time. A decade later, when my husband and I found ourselves alone one Christmas day, I thought I would die. I didn’t. I adapted.

I’ve never been overly fond of dogs, though my husband loves them and so do our sons. Now when we all gather, there are four dogs in our midst. I’ve adapted.

I love to bake and I love getting both our sons and their families together –they are all vegans now and cooking, especially baking, is a challenge for me when they come to the house, but I’ve adapted (sort of).

When you think back on your life and how it’s changed over the years, do you consider your faith? Do you practice your faith in the same way you did 20 years ago? During this busy, hectic, shortened Advent season, take a long slow breath and reflect on that. In this last little bit of time left before we celebrate the birth of our Lord, find the time to read scripture, listen with greater care. Do the words strike you differently than they have in the past? Times change, but God is constant. He reaches out to us, calling us to live our faith more deeply; to pay greater attention to the path he is calling us to. Let us adapt to his will in this new Church year!

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In a Tumultuous World

Only during Holy Week do I ever really consider the circumstances of Jesus’ crucifixion. How could such a thing happen? If I had been there, surely I would not have been one with the crowd that shouted “Crucify him.” But would I have stood silent, for fear of what the crowd would do to me?

When my children were young, I would not let them use the word hate, it’s a bad word. “You may say, ‘I dislike intensely,’ but never say hate.” That being said, I hate crowds. There’s an energy and an influence that takes over, suddenly. In a flash, it is no longer a group of individuals, but a mob, of one mind – the mind and the influence of the leader(s) and violence and chaos can take over in a heartbeat.

The events that transpired in Charlottesville, Virginia, recently, filled me with sadness and dread. In addition to the events themselves, the way the president dealt with them and the way the United States has been divided by them, one can only worry.

It seems as if the world has turned upside down and inside out. Genocide is taking place in parts of our world; devastation from hurricanes, floods and earthquakes south of us; white supremacists are coming out of the woodwork; the leaders of North Korea and the United States have resorted to adolescent name-calling; and mass killings in Las Vegas. But, what has the president of the United States up in arms? A group of athletes ‘taking a knee’ in quiet, peaceful protest. What is this world coming to?

One can so easily become disheartened hearing, reading and watching these events unfold before our eyes. Several things keep me centered when I begin to feel weighed down by world atrocities: 1.) I truly believe these things have been going on since time immemorial, but technology now brings them to us instantly, sometimes we even see them happening live; 2.) I believe there is an equal amount of goodness in the world (which sadly, the media does not consider newsworthy); and 3.) I believe prayer can heal wounds and action can change lives.

We must remain positive and prayerful. But we cannot afford to remain silent in the light of injustice. Jesus did not tolerate injustice. He did not use violence; he did not berate the crowd, his means were always non-violent, but effective. We can follow Jesus’ lead. In our own way, in our own space, we can heal wounds, change lives, and instill hope – with love, positivity and prayer.

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Love

Post author By admin
Post date May 23, 2017
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When my sons were in their teens, the protestations began about attending Mass. I explained to them that this was my job, part of the job of raising them – to build a solid foundation of faith. They rolled their eyes and simply chalked it up with all the other restrictions and limitations I placed on their lives. I speak singularly, as if my husband wasn’t in the picture. He was, but he was the softy; I was the one who held them to the house rules. I never felt I was a strict disciplinarian, but once

we decided on a certain plan of action – I didn’t waffle, as someone else might have.

Skip ahead two decades and we have finally reached that point I had always heard about and had only dreamed of – that point in their lives when they see us differently; they admire our wisdom. Our one son, with three children, now realizes the importance of rules and holding kids to them. His younger brother – soon to be a father, is observant. Our daughters-in-law often swell our heads, complimenting us on raising such wonderful sons. I simply look heavenward, with thankful praise to God for his bounteous gifts. They are not church goers, these sons of ours, but they were given a foundation of faith, they were taught respect and were respected, and they were immersed in love. I have hope…I have faith.

On Mother’s Day, our oldest, invited not only his parents to his house, but his in-laws, his brother and his wife – the expectant parents – and his brother’s in-laws. We mothers were honoured but I, and most especially my son’s wife, were very proud. He worked tirelessly to ensure everything was just so, for these many women in his life.

I learned from my own parents that lecturing and preaching to non-practicing children does nothing to increase their desire to return to the Church. In many instances, it alienates grown children from their parents. My son once told his wife (right in front of me), “Some people preach their faith, but my parents live their faith.” My eyes welled up with tears. I have hope…I have faith.

Sitting and observing all the busyness of Mother’s Day, what I witnessed everywhere I looked was love. My husband and my son, busy in the kitchen; my younger son and his pregnant wife, cuddled up on the chaise in the living room; the grandchildren playing on the floor with their other grandpa, and we ladies sitting around the dining room table, sipping wine, laughing and sharing stories of times past. Everywhere I looked, I saw love. God’s love. God is love.

A dear friend very recently said to me, “God equals love – love equals God.” I have great faith…I have much hope

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Going Back a Few Years (in loving memory)

Post author By admin
Post date March 17, 2017
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This one’s going to be about my sister Patti. Patricia Luca, the one we have been praying for since last June, when the doctors found a large mass in her colon which had spread to other vital organs in her body. The impact for me at that time was like getting a phone call saying, ‘your sister has been in a car crash and we don’t think she’s going to make it.’ I’ve been reeling ever since. The whole family is in shock – our baby sister. People ask me all the time, “How’s your sister doing?” And I don’t know what to say. Well, what I always say is, ‘if she walked into this room right now, you would not know she was sick.’ There’s a bounce to her step and a sparkle in her eyes that the gravest reports from her doctors cannot diminish.

Patti has always towered over me and, consequently, most people assumed she was older, when we were growing up. It’s not just her stature but her ability to commandeer a conversation. If someone asked me a question, she would answer for me (when I was in my 20s even!). It annoyed her, everyone always thinking she was the elder sibling, to which I would helpfully reply, “Well quit taking over every situation, why don’t you?”

There are four years between the two of us and it took a long time for us to become close. It was my own friends, in high school, who liked having her around, hanging out with us. She was funny and a good fit. When she would come to visit me at university, in Boston, she charmed my roommates. Walking down a city street, talking away, she would stop, mid-sentence, to say hello to a passerby. She was in high school when my parents decided to move to our summer home in Maine year round. I worried that my sister would never be able to live safely in a city again, she was too friendly and naïve.

When she was in university, she spent her junior year abroad, in Switzerland. She studied German in preparation for her stay and found herself in a French speaking canton. It took some time before her high school French came back to her, but when I arrived in March, to spend a month with her, she was fluent in both languages – German and French. She amazed me then; she amazes me still.

Now, with three beautiful grown kids, she finds herself gravely facing mortality. Patti does not focus on gravity, or mortality. Her husband tells me how much the nurses love her when she goes for her chemo treatments. ‘She’s got them laughing within minutes of her arrival. She’s not their typical cancer patient,’ he says with a smile on a worried face.

I know so many of you are facing this very same situation. I know each member of our parish family has a similar story to tell. This is my story. Thank you for your prayers, I will pray for you and the one that’s in your heart.

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And So We Begin

Are you ready? Our Lenten journey begins this Wednesday – Ash Wednesday – and how do you plan to traverse the desert that is these 40 days? I like to change things up every once in a while, ever since my husband laughed at me for giving up chocolate for the umpteenth time. I’m a chocoholic and I felt this was a tremendous penance, but really, to what gain? Did my abstaining from chocolate benefit anyone else? Sadly, no. In Isaiah 58.5-7, we read: Is this the manner of fasting I wish, of keeping a day of penance: That a man bow his head like a reed, and lie in sackcloth and ashes? Do you call this a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord? This, rather, is the fasting that I wish: releasing those bound unjustly, untying the thongs of the yoke; setting free the oppressed, breaking every yoke; sharing your bread with the hungry, sheltering the oppressed and the homeless; clothing the naked when you see them, and not turning your back on your own. There are so many fruitful ways to travel through Lent, we need only look around us for ways in which we can be helpful; giving, kind and loving.

Jesus says, Beware of practising your piety before people in order to be seen by them, for then you have no reward from your Father in heaven. So I will not share my Lenten intentions, but I have become ever mindful that prayer, fasting and almsgiving must be for the benefit of others or there is not purpose to it. If we pray ceaselessly, if we fast from gossip and angry words and if we give to those around us who are in need we will be on the right path. Let’s take some time today to map out that path – just so we don’t get lost en route