Category: Catholic

Once a Mother…

As a mother with young children, I would often ponder Mary, the Mother of God. Did she have days of exhaustion and frustration chasing after her toddler? When he hit the terrible 2s, how did she deal with that? If he was slightly defiant at 12, what was her son like as a teenager? ‘I don’t care if you are the son of God – you clean up this room!’ It often helped me to cope, picturing our Blessed Mother enduring the same trials of motherhood. I know, I know, hers was the incarnate son of God, but, as a teenager…it’s possible there were parental struggles. I clung to that, anyway.

One of my favorite stories of Mary, is that of the wedding feast, when she tells the steward to, ‘do whatever he tells you to do.’ I can almost picture Jesus rolling his eyes. “Mom.” He was a grown man and there was his mother, situated in the midst of his personal life. I have tried my best to avoid being obtrusive in my sons’ lives. But when situations arise whereupon a mother is sought, well, I’m like that obnoxious kid in class, arm waving frantically in the air – pick me, pick me!

A few weeks ago, I had my pre-Christmas weekend all planned – finishing up my Christmas projects and shopping. A call from my daughter-in-law changed all that. Now, granted, I was called because her mother is wintering in Mexico, but let’s not split hairs – I was called. I was needed.

It happened that my son was in the hospital (I hope I would have been called first, regardless of where her mother was, but I dare not assume). Thankfully, it was not a serious illness, though it was a debilitating one and he was hospitalized for two nights. As his wife flitted from hospital to home, I was the constant for my one year old grandson.

When your child is going through a difficult time, no matter his age, you worry. Again, picture our Blessed Mother and all that she had to endure, with all that Jesus had to endure. Ponder that when times are tough. As Jesus suffered, so did his Mother. It matters not, the age of our children – they are our children. When they are sick, when they are suffering, we suffer too.

One of the constants we as Catholics have in our lives, is Mary, the Mother of God – intercessor for us all. As our kids turn to us when they need help – let us then turn to our eternal Mother. Mary, Holy Mother of God, pray for us.

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Let’s Not Be Judgey

When you’re at Mass, do you sometimes sneak a sidewise glance at someone near you, your mind wandering from the Liturgy to instead think about how this one is dressed, how that one looks, health-wise, and what’s going on with her hair? Oh, come on, I’m sure I’m not the only one. Hard as we try, we sometimes lose the battle to keep focused; we fight but lose the war against judging our neighbours. Most of the time it’s harmless mind rambling. It’s not gossip, we’re simply giving in to the chatter going on in our heads. With the smallest amount of effort, we can pull ourselves back to the Liturgy and our involvement in it.
I often make assumptions – about events, situations and, most especially people – and in my assumptions, I judge. This has tripped me up more times than I care to recount, but I must, otherwise I will never be able to move on; I will never be able to grow in charity and love. Our mind wanderings and assumptions can become dangerous, I think, when we step across the boundary of harmless rambling thoughts to observing how those around us pray and worship – and we judge. We have our way of doing things, and if others aren’t in alignment with us – we judge. This is not good for us and it’s certainly not good for our neighbour. This can lead to an unhealthy us vs them mentality, setting us off in the wrong direction.
The apostles, constantly ran up against division from the people they were striving to serve. Even amongst themselves, at times, they fought over one issue or another. It happens. But there are large issues and then there are small issues. How you pray, as opposed to how I pray; how you practice your faith in comparison to how I live mine, in my mind, is a small issue.
Based on St. Paul’s teachings, Marty Haugen’s beautiful hymn tells us, ‘We are many parts, we are all one body.’ A tapestry of woven threads that, in its entirety, in the light of the Liturgy, the Sacraments, the Body and Blood of Christ – we are woven into one baptized people. So you see? There’s no reason to judge. We are all gathered together for the very same reason – our faith. Let us extol our love for God in our love for one another, and let us be joyful!

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REJOICE

Post author By admin
Post date April 6, 2018
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I hope you will indulge me. This is something I wrote four years ago, but never shared. Seeing as how my sister’s birthday fell on Easter Monday, it naturally came to mind.

I’ve made several attempts to begin this piece, but it does not come as easily as some. The winter was long and difficult and spring has been resistant, all of which reflects my mood – cold and dark, slowly emerging. Through the winter months my sister’s health took a turn from which she could not come back. The weight dropped off her, pain set in, but through it all, her faith, her fight and her humor never wavered. She was a tremendous example to all the family of determination with grace and dignity. Just as our mother had been 25 years before. From Christmas on, my husband and I made plans to travel to Rhode Island to be with her, but storm after storm thwarted our efforts. When the skies would clear, the temperatures would plummet, and then we feared returning to frozen pipes. Finally, in early March we made the 11 hour journey and spent two days by her side. The priest had already anointed her, her daughter and son-in-law from Switzerland were there and we knew the end was near. In hushed voices, my niece and I talked. “She’s afraid of dying,” Jessy said, sadly. My niece did her best to give me time alone with my sister, but each time the house grew quiet, with just the two of us there, she would fall deeply asleep. She was exhausted. On the second and last day of our visit, she slept the entire time, waking only briefly. When it was time for us to leave, I knew I had to say something that would comfort her, but what? It had to be quick, but it had to calm her and ease her fears.

“Just rest,” I told her, “don’t worry about anything.”

“Oh, I wish,” she said.

“Patti,” I said, taking her hands in mine. “You are loved. You are so loved! God is love – and that is all you need to think about.”

She died four days later, in complete peace, her family told me.

Now we are in the joyful Easter season! But before we could rejoice in Easter celebration, we had to first experience Christ’s agony and death. Thankfully, our faith teaches us that the death of a loved one is not the end…but a new beginning. And how can we not rejoice in that?

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Lenten Practices

It’s Lent and we can trudge through it looking dismal, so everyone knows we’ve taken on onerous practices, or we can open our eyes to the gifts God provides us with on a daily basis – and smile.

Are you’re like me? Sometimes the smallest change of routine can throw me off balance. We were looking after our son’s dog while he and his family went on a holiday to warmer climes. Not one week, not two…but three long weeks of a four legged addition to our household. I don’t need to tell you who looked after this guest. I was the one to take him outside first thing in the morning and last thing at night. My husband, who sleeps like the dead, was nowhere near rising when Banksy and I began the day and, in the evening he had long since ascended the stairs before the dog and I were ready to retire.

Our dog sleeps in a kennel in the kitchen, my son’s dog sleeps in their bedroom…on their bed – I drew the line there, letting him sleep in our room, but on his own bed. He sleeps in quite late, my son informed me. Well, no, he only sleeps in if the people he’s sleeping with do. When I rose at 5:45, so did Banksy, rearing to go.

Change can be discombobulating, it can make us ornery and cantankerous – but when we’re doing good things for others, is that the way to do it? I don’t think so. It rather defeats the purpose. Admittedly, I was a bit ornery at the start of our new living arrangements, but, over time, a new routine developed.

We have an invisible fence for our dog and each morning I slap her collar on her and send her out the door. I soon discovered that having to go outside with Banksy in the morning allowed me to appreciate the beauty of the morning sky – the rising sun, the crisp crunch of the snow underfoot. Each evening when we’d go out one last time, I’d stare up into the night sky and marvel at the beauty and the wonder that shone down from the heavens.

An inconvenience can sometimes bring about wonderful discoveries in ourselves and in the world around us. Our three weeks of dog-sitting prepared me for Lent –showing me how change of routine (being deprived of our creature comforts) can be energizing; it taught me to adapt with a happy heart and it opened my eyes to God’s beauty and splendour. There’s no need to dismally trudge through Lent – God’s gifts are everywhere, when we open our hearts to his graces.

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Time for a Change

Look back, way back, to Christmases past. Do you have fond memories of Christmases that you share with your children, your grandchildren? Was last Christmas like those of, say 20 years ago? Of course not. Why? Because things change, situations change…and we adapt.

When my sons were in their teens, I told them they would never have to race around the country side on Christmas day, rushing to visit in-laws and us all in one day. That was something we never had to do and I told them I would not subject them to it. They stared at me blankly at the time. A decade later, when my husband and I found ourselves alone one Christmas day, I thought I would die. I didn’t. I adapted.

I’ve never been overly fond of dogs, though my husband loves them and so do our sons. Now when we all gather, there are four dogs in our midst. I’ve adapted.

I love to bake and I love getting both our sons and their families together –they are all vegans now and cooking, especially baking, is a challenge for me when they come to the house, but I’ve adapted (sort of).

When you think back on your life and how it’s changed over the years, do you consider your faith? Do you practice your faith in the same way you did 20 years ago? During this busy, hectic, shortened Advent season, take a long slow breath and reflect on that. In this last little bit of time left before we celebrate the birth of our Lord, find the time to read scripture, listen with greater care. Do the words strike you differently than they have in the past? Times change, but God is constant. He reaches out to us, calling us to live our faith more deeply; to pay greater attention to the path he is calling us to. Let us adapt to his will in this new Church year!

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In a Tumultuous World

Only during Holy Week do I ever really consider the circumstances of Jesus’ crucifixion. How could such a thing happen? If I had been there, surely I would not have been one with the crowd that shouted “Crucify him.” But would I have stood silent, for fear of what the crowd would do to me?

When my children were young, I would not let them use the word hate, it’s a bad word. “You may say, ‘I dislike intensely,’ but never say hate.” That being said, I hate crowds. There’s an energy and an influence that takes over, suddenly. In a flash, it is no longer a group of individuals, but a mob, of one mind – the mind and the influence of the leader(s) and violence and chaos can take over in a heartbeat.

The events that transpired in Charlottesville, Virginia, recently, filled me with sadness and dread. In addition to the events themselves, the way the president dealt with them and the way the United States has been divided by them, one can only worry.

It seems as if the world has turned upside down and inside out. Genocide is taking place in parts of our world; devastation from hurricanes, floods and earthquakes south of us; white supremacists are coming out of the woodwork; the leaders of North Korea and the United States have resorted to adolescent name-calling; and mass killings in Las Vegas. But, what has the president of the United States up in arms? A group of athletes ‘taking a knee’ in quiet, peaceful protest. What is this world coming to?

One can so easily become disheartened hearing, reading and watching these events unfold before our eyes. Several things keep me centered when I begin to feel weighed down by world atrocities: 1.) I truly believe these things have been going on since time immemorial, but technology now brings them to us instantly, sometimes we even see them happening live; 2.) I believe there is an equal amount of goodness in the world (which sadly, the media does not consider newsworthy); and 3.) I believe prayer can heal wounds and action can change lives.

We must remain positive and prayerful. But we cannot afford to remain silent in the light of injustice. Jesus did not tolerate injustice. He did not use violence; he did not berate the crowd, his means were always non-violent, but effective. We can follow Jesus’ lead. In our own way, in our own space, we can heal wounds, change lives, and instill hope – with love, positivity and prayer.

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Busy People

Post author By admin
Post date July 6, 2017
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We are busy, busy, busy, aren’t we – especially in summer. The retired parishioners who come into the office can make my head spin, when they regale me with their ongoing concerns. I’m afraid to retire, I don’t think I could keep up the pace they have set for themselves. We have parishioners who farm – their days are long and demanding and I can’t even imagine how they do it. My life seems tranquil compared to so many in our faith community, but it wasn’t always.

When my kids were young, I was involved in every organization they took part in, as well as a few of my own – if an executive needed members, I stepped up. I ran myself ragged with work, kids, running them to their activities and, consequently, going to lots of meetings.

With age we tend to gain wisdom; we know our limits; we better focus our interests, our talents and our energy. Well, some of us do, and with the rest of us it takes longer to find that focus. It has taken me a long time. I once wrote a missive for the bulletin in which I said, “I run, but I’m not an athlete, I write, but I’m not a writer…” well, I have since changed my thinking on that score.

I’ve decided to train for a ½ marathon this summer; I told my writing group that I will have my novel finished (at least the 5^th draft) by the time my grandchild is born in September. And, speaking of said grandchild…I have three knitting projects on the go for the new baby. I am well aware that my pastime activities are not as noble as so many of yours are. But my running raises funds for the hospital and cancer research; my knitting seems to make my daughters-in-law very happy…and my writing, well, that’s something I am compelled to do. This summer I have raised the bar on all of these pursuits, which throws me into doubt from time to time. Will I get everything done I have set out to do? Maybe not. The difference between my earlier self and now is that I have a better sense of balance.

Things fall apart pretty quickly when we lack balance, and I’m not talking about getting plenty of rest and eating properly. Our spiritual well-being and our prayer life are an essential part of a balanced life. If they’re not, we lose a sense of peace within. Without prayer, reflection, contemplation and a faith community to bolster us – our busyness can deplete us and leave us without true purpose. Take a step back, sit in church, reflect… Be still and know that I am God. Ps 46.10

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Ordinary Time

We are back to Ordinary Time…in the Church and in our lives. Christmas and New Year’s festivities are over, decorations are packed away and those lovely extra days off are but a distant memory. But, ordinary to me means – the usual…the same old same old…and one can become complacent with the ordinary, which we should never be. Of course, that is not its meaning in the Church Calendar, for each and every Sunday we celebrate the day of the risen Lord, which is far from ordinary.

So how do we handle ordinary times in the grind of our daily lives? Our lives are a spiritual journey and we can speed along like we’re traveling the 401 on cruise control, or we can take the less traveled route and fill our hearts and minds with beauty and wonder.

I recently read the book The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything. The premise is – where what you’re good at and what you’re passionate about intersect is where you’ll find your element. (I’m hoping this will push me to write more than I do.) One of the wonderful things that happens when we pay closer attention on our journey is that we become open to the extraordinary…I came upon this prayer the other day and it, along with the book I’m reading gave me an Aha! Moment:

God our father, you have a plan for each one of us. You hold out to us a future full of hope. Give us the wisdom of your Spirit so that we can see the shape of your plan in the gifts you have given us, and in the circumstances of our daily lives.

Amen to that! Let’s pay attention on our journey, and try our hardest not to be ordinary

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The Nativity

On December 23rd, I happened upon The Nativity on CBC television. Instantly, I was skeptical – another nativity production – why? Well I stuck with it and was happy I did.
I have to admit, I have always found the story of the virgin birth a difficult one to grasp. Of course our faith is built on so many truths we accept without understanding, but what I have always found difficult is how accepting Mary and Joseph were of their dreams. Can you imagine – “I had this crazy dream that I am to have a child and he will be the son of God.” “Really?!? Cool!” Would these revelations fly today? I can’t see it happening. We are so filled with mistrust and doubt.
What I loved about The Nativity; that had me spellbound within minutes, was the doubt and uncertainty of Mary and most especially Joseph, even after the angel had come and explained these things. This depiction of them helped me to relate to them better.
In this film, Mary goes to visit her pregnant cousin Elizabeth with disbelief and concern in equal measure. Elizabeth helps her to better understand the words of the archangel. When she returns home, visibly pregnant herself, the townspeople are horrified, they ridicule her. Joseph is shocked, hurt and bitter. Try explaining to a guy who is hurling furniture in anger – ‘It’s ok, this is the son of God.’ He wasn’t buying it.
In this movie, Joseph plans to leave; heading to Bethlehem for the census and Mary’s father begs him to take Mary with him, for her own protection. “She cannot stay here,” he tells Joseph, “she will be stoned to death.”
Grudgingly, Joseph takes her with him. But his anger does not even let him accept the words of the angel when he appears to sort things out for him. Finally, Jesus is born. Whose heart does not melt at the sight of a new born baby? And when the shepherd arrives, being told of this birth by…yes, an angel; and a short while later the wise men appear on the scene, Joseph is in awe of this child, and what all this attention means. He thinks back to what the angel told him…he believes.
Now, having been given the barest of facts related to Jesus’ birth, one can conjure up many interpretations of how the events unfolded. I like this particular portrayal, written by Tony Jordan for the BBC, because it portrays Mary and Joseph in ways I can truly understand – confused, frightened, questioning. Of course God chose them to be the earthly parents of Jesus because of their purity of heart, their devotion, their faith and willingness to do God’s will. But this contemporary slant on the nativity of Jesus helps me to understand how they may have reached acceptance. It does not diminish their stature in my eyes; rather their strength fills me with awe

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WAITING

Advent is a time of expectant anticipation. But, oh, we are an impatient age. Even those of us who are older, we are no longer content to wait for anything. So what do we do with Advent? Has it lost its significance in our lives? We’re supposed to fill this time of waiting with prayer and reflection…but, if you’re like me, it’s filled with preparations for Christmas – and not so much for the blessed nativity, but in shopping, baking and the writing of Christmas cards. How did this happen…and why? It seems everything that humankind gets involved in becomes inflated and out of control. Is it too late to turn this around? Can we just decide to stop the madness and dole out lots of love and rejoice in the nativity of the Lord and call that Christmas?

Yes, we can…we don’t though, because there are children and grandchildren to consider. But are we underestimating our offspring with that kind of thinking? This past summer, both of our sons, along with their spouses, bought new homes. They are busy with renovations and improvements and both families came to the conclusion that, since we would all be together at Christmas, wasn’t that gift enough? Let’s get gifts for the children and let’s have our gathering together be gift for the rest of us.

I was actually the only one to protest – But can’t I knit things?

Oh yes, my daughters-in-law eagerly replied, but let’s not spend money on extravagant gifts. That warmed my heart and gave me hope!

Let’s take time this Advent season, to consider what Christmas really means to us. Let’s stop the madness where we can and fill these days with a bit of peace and joyful anticipation and preparation for the coming of our Lord!