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Faith family God Humor Listening Trust

Perceptions

Have you ever wondered about those little details that vary in the telling of the four Gospels? Of course, each Gospel was written at a different time, for a different audience, but still, how is it that certain things are omitted, and other details are there but, well, different?

A recent phone conversation with my brother went something like this:

“Remember how, on July 4th, Judy would always say, ˜well, the summer’s practically shot,'” John said. Judy is our oldest sister, now deceased.

“What? Judy didn’t say that. It was Mamie (our great-grandmother, long deceased also).”

“No, Margie, I distinctly remember Judy saying that. Besides, that’s not how Mamie talked.”

“Well, Judy must have been paraphrasing Mamie, because I remember her saying, ‘July 4th already. The summer is practically over.”

“But I can see Judy when she said it, she’s sitting on her towel at the high tide beach.”

“Where was the high tide beach?”

“The one by Ames’ property.”

“That was the high tide beach? I just called it our beach.”

See how things can get skewed? John is 8 years my senior, so he would remember things I would not know, but, now that he is in his 70s, I have him doubting his memory of events. And neither Judy nor Mamie are here to verify the facts.

To get my siblings conferring on the subject of my falling out of a moving car when I was two, would have your head spinning – four different individuals, four different takes on the subject – all hilarious, except for Michael’s version. He was five and obviously traumatized by the event. “It wasn’t funny,” is always his contribution to the story.

It’s no wonder we are sometimes confused by the variations in the Gospels –  different people perceive things differently. But, though some of the details may be omitted or embellished, the core of the message, that kernel of truth – about Jesus, about his words and actions – is at the heart of the matter. And that is Good News indeed.

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Categories
Catholic Faith family God Spiritual Renewal

Busy People

We are busy, busy, busy, aren’t we – especially in summer. The retired parishioners who come into the office can make my head spin, when they regale me with their ongoing concerns. I’m afraid to retire, I don’t think I could keep up the pace they have set for themselves. We have parishioners who farm – their days are long and demanding and I can’t even imagine how they do it. My life seems tranquil compared to so many in our faith community, but it wasn’t always.

When my kids were young, I was involved in every organization they took part in, as well as a few of my own – if an executive needed members, I stepped up. I ran myself ragged with work, kids, running them to their activities and, consequently, going to lots of meetings.

With age we tend to gain wisdom; we know our limits; we better focus our interests, our talents and our energy. Well, some of us do, and with the rest of us it takes longer to find that focus. It has taken me a long time. I once wrote a missive for the bulletin in which I said, “I run, but I’m not an athlete, I write, but I’m not a writer…” well, I have since changed my thinking on that score.

I’ve decided to train for a ½ marathon this summer; I told my writing group that I will have my novel finished (at least the 5th draft) by the time my grandchild is born in September. And, speaking of said grandchild…I have three knitting projects on the go for the new baby. I am well aware that my pastime activities are not as noble as so many of yours are. But my running raises funds for the hospital and cancer research; my knitting seems to make my daughters-in-law very happy…and my writing, well, that’s something I am compelled to do. This summer I have raised the bar on all of these pursuits, which throws me into doubt from time to time. Will I get everything done I have set out to do? Maybe not. The difference between my earlier self and now is that I have a better sense of balance.

Things fall apart pretty quickly when we lack balance, and I’m not talking about getting plenty of rest and eating properly. Our spiritual well-being and our prayer life are an essential part of a balanced life. If they’re not, we lose a sense of peace within.  Without prayer, reflection, contemplation and a faith community to bolster us – our busyness can deplete us and leave us without true purpose. Take a step back, sit in church, reflect… Be still and know that I am God. Ps 46.10

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Faith family God love Prayer Trust

Love

When my sons were in their teens, the protestations began about attending Mass. I explained to them that this was my job, part of the job of raising them – to build a solid foundation of faith. They rolled their eyes and simply chalked it up with all the other restrictions and limitations I placed on their lives. I speak singularly, as if my husband wasn’t in the picture. He was, but he was the softy; I was the one who held them to the house rules. I never felt I was a strict disciplinarian, but once

we decided on a certain plan of action – I didn’t waffle, as someone else might have.

Skip ahead two decades and we have finally reached that point I had always heard about and had only dreamed of – that point in their lives when they see us differently; they admire our wisdom. Our one son, with three children, now realizes the importance of rules and holding kids to them.  His younger brother – soon to be a father, is observant. Our daughters-in-law often swell our heads, complimenting us on raising such wonderful sons. I simply look heavenward, with thankful praise to God for his bounteous gifts. They are not church goers, these sons of ours, but they were given a foundation of faith, they were taught respect and were respected, and they were immersed in love. I have hope…I have faith.

On Mother’s Day, our oldest, invited not only his parents to his house, but his in-laws, his brother and his wife – the expectant parents – and his brother’s in-laws. We mothers were honoured but I, and most especially my son’s wife, were very proud. He worked tirelessly to ensure everything was just so, for these many women in his life.

I learned from my own parents that lecturing and preaching to non-practicing children does nothing to increase their desire to return to the Church. In many instances, it alienates grown children from their parents. My son once told his wife (right in front of me), “Some people preach their faith, but my parents live their faith.” My eyes welled up with tears. I have hope…I have faith.

Sitting and observing all the busyness of Mother’s Day, what I witnessed everywhere I looked was love. My husband and my son, busy in the kitchen; my younger son and his pregnant wife, cuddled up on the chaise in the living room; the grandchildren playing on the floor with their other grandpa, and we ladies sitting around the dining room table, sipping wine, laughing and sharing stories of times past. Everywhere I looked, I saw love. God’s love. God is love.

A dear friend very recently said to me, “God equals love – love equals God.” I have great faith…I have much hope

Categories
Easter family God Humor love

Serving One Another

serveWhen I discovered my birthday fell on Easter Sunday this year, I felt it a great gift, because it wasn’t just any birthday, but a rather significant one. As the day crept closer, and neither of my kids stepped up to say, ‘Hey mom, since Easter Sunday is on your birthday (and a rather significant one at that), we’ll host Easter this year.’ This did not happen. Then my husband required surgery, with his recovery overlapping Easter. I knew he wouldn’t want to travel anywhere, so I stepped up and said that Easter would be at our house.

My youngest son seemed confused by this announcement, ‘But isn’t that what we normally do?’

‘Yes,’ I replied, calmly enough, ‘but Easter doesn’t normally fall on my birthday.’ Probably not so calmly with that last part. I must admit, I felt put upon.

You see, my father always made sure each of his seven children got special treatment on their birthdays. In fact, it was one of the spouses of one of my siblings who first observed that we McDonalds don’t really have birthdays…we have birth weeks! Now you see where I’m coming from.

So, that was the mindset leading up to Holy Week.  And as that week progressed, I cleaned, I prepped and readied the house for our guests.

It was most fortunate that the beautiful liturgies of the Triduum preceded Easter Sunday, because those liturgies, and Fr. Kuzma’s homilies on service and humility, turned everything around for me. One day I grudgingly went about my preparations… and the next day I lovingly and joyfully went about doing what needed to be done. Just like that, I got over myself and looked forward to having everything just so when everyone arrived.

My daughters-in-law celebrate birthdays three and four days after mine and a granddaughter shares her mother’s birthday too. We celebrated Easter and four birthdays on Easter Sunday. My eldest son made an incredible birthday cake, everyone brought food and the day was glorious and special.

If we open our hearts and minds, God can help us to see beyond ourselves; can work with our imperfect souls in very special ways. If we open our hearts and minds everything changes – we change – for the good.

Not only that, but I still had six more days of my birth week, so it was indeed all good (and truly blest).

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Faith family Lent love

Keeping it Simple

When my husband and I were first married, I lovingly (and mistakenly) began the practice of bringing him coffee in bed each and every morning. It was a simple task, a small thing, but it meant a lot to him. It was easy. I smile now at the thought of how things…how life can begin simply enough and, over time, become more complicated. In those early days, when we were young and attractive, and love was new and easy, it was coffee, black – simple.

Over time, things change, we change – slowly, sometimes imperceptibly, but then you wake up one morning and a simple task you could once do in your sleep – coffee, black, changes to tea – carefully measured, steeped just so long, with this much sugar and a dash of milk. Life gets complicated. Do I ever complain? Sometimes. Would I stop performing this task? Never. Despite the changes over time, it is still done for the same reason – love. Sometimes I bring my husband’s tea, wake him gently, have a brief conversation, and then I go off for a run. It’s all good. But if I return an hour later and the tea is untouched, my husband is back in dreamland and he intends to travel with me to Owen Sound…well, that’s a different scenario entirely.

The beautiful thing about Lent is how it calls us to deeper prayer, increased alms-giving, with greater attention to others’ needs over our own; and a call to fast, to abstain. We set out on our Lenten journey with the best of intentions but sometimes life gets in the way and we are thrown off track. Our Lenten practice need not be complicated. We can begin in our very own homes, performing simple tasks with greater love and care. Fasting from angry words and quick tempered reactions. Little things like these spill over into our daily lives and beyond our homes. Sometimes we place heavy burdens on ourselves that we cannot keep up and rather than simplify the course of our Lenten journey – we give up. Never give up. Keep it simple. I’ve said it before – Jesus – Others – You. The proper perspective will bring you JOY through Lent!

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Death family love Prayer Uncategorized

Going Back a Few Years (in loving memory)

Patti & meThis one’s going to be about my sister Patti.  Patricia Luca, the one we have been praying for since last June, when the doctors found a large mass in her colon which had spread to other vital organs in her body.  The impact for me at that time was like getting a phone call saying, ‘your sister has been in a car crash and we don’t think she’s going to make it.’  I’ve been reeling ever since.  The whole family is in shock – our baby sister. People ask me all the time, “How’s your sister doing?”  And I don’t know what to say.  Well, what I always say is, ‘if she walked into this room right now, you would not know she was sick.’  There’s a bounce to her step and a sparkle in her eyes that the gravest reports from her doctors cannot diminish. 

Patti has always towered over me and, consequently, most people assumed she was older, when we were growing up.  It’s not just her stature but her ability to commandeer a conversation.  If someone asked me a question, she would answer for me (when I was in my 20s even!).   It annoyed her, everyone always thinking she was the elder sibling, to which I would helpfully reply, “Well quit taking over every situation, why don’t you?”

There are four years between the two of us and it took a long time for us to become close.  It was my own friends, in high school, who liked having her around, hanging out with us.  She was funny and a good fit.  When she would come to visit me at university, in Boston, she charmed my roommates.  Walking down a city street, talking away, she would stop, mid-sentence, to say hello to a passerby.  She was in high school when my parents decided to move to our summer home in Maine year round.  I worried that my sister would never be able to live safely in a city again, she was too friendly and naïve.

When she was in university, she spent her junior year abroad, in Switzerland.  She studied German in preparation for her stay and found herself in a French speaking canton.  It took some time before her high school French came back to her, but when I arrived in March, to spend a month with her, she was fluent in both languages – German and French.  She amazed me then; she amazes me still.

Now, with three beautiful grown kids, she finds herself gravely facing mortality.  Patti does not focus on gravity, or mortality.  Her husband tells me how much the nurses love her when she goes for her chemo treatments.  ‘She’s got them laughing within minutes of her arrival.  She’s not their typical cancer patient,’ he says with a smile on a worried face.

I know so many of you are facing this very same situation.  I know each member of our parish family has a similar story to tell.  This is my story.  Thank you for your prayers, I will pray for you and the one that’s in your heart.

Categories
Faith family God Lent love Mercy Prayer

And So We Begin

Are you ready? Our Lenten journey begins this Wednesday – Ash LentWednesday – and how do you plan to traverse the desert that is these 40 days? I like to change things up every once in a while, ever since my husband laughed at me for giving up chocolate for the umpteenth time. I’m a chocoholic and I felt this was a tremendous penance, but really, to what gain? Did my abstaining from chocolate benefit anyone else? Sadly, no. In Isaiah 58.5-7, we read: Is this the manner of fasting I wish, of keeping a day of penance: That a man bow his head like a reed, and lie in sackcloth and ashes? Do you call this a fast, a day acceptable to the Lord? This, rather, is the fasting that I wish: releasing those bound unjustly, untying the thongs of the yoke; setting free the oppressed, breaking every yoke; sharing your bread with the hungry, sheltering the oppressed and the homeless; clothing the naked when you see them, and not turning your back on your own. There are so many fruitful ways to travel through Lent, we need only look around us for ways in which we can be helpful; giving, kind and loving.

Jesus says, Beware of practising your piety before people in order to be seen by them, for then you have no reward from your Father in heaven. So I will not share my Lenten intentions, but I have become ever mindful that prayer, fasting and almsgiving must be for the benefit of others or there is not purpose to it. If we pray ceaselessly, if we fast from gossip and angry words and if we give to those around us who are in need we will be on the right path. Let’s take some time today to map out that path – just so we don’t get lost en route

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Catholic Faith God Listening Prayer Trust

Ordinary Time

We are back to Ordinary Time…in the Church and in our lives.  Christmas and New Year’s festivities are over, decorations are packed away and those lovelysnowstorm extra days off are but a distant memory.  But, ordinary to me means – the usual…the same old same old…and one can become complacent with the ordinary, which we should never be.  Of course, that is not its meaning in the Church Calendar, for each and every Sunday we celebrate the day of the risen Lord, which is far from ordinary.

So how do we handle ordinary times in the grind of our daily lives?  Our lives are a spiritual journey and we can speed along like we’re traveling the 401 on cruise control, or we can take the less traveled route and fill our hearts and minds with beauty and wonder.

I recently read the book The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything. The premise is – where what you’re good at and what you’re passionate about intersect is where you’ll find your element.  (I’m hoping this will push me to write more than I do.)  One of the wonderful things that happens when we pay closer attention on our journey is that we become open to the extraordinary…I came upon this prayer the other day and it, along with the book I’m reading gave me an Aha! Moment:

God our father, you have a plan for each one of us.  You hold out to us a future full of hope.  Give us the wisdom of your Spirit so that we can see the shape of your plan in the gifts you have given us, and in the circumstances of our daily lives.

Amen to that!  Let’s pay attention on our journey, and try our hardest not to be ordinary

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Catholic Faith family God Humor love Mercy Prayer Stength Uncategorized

The Nativity

On December 23rd, I happened upon The Nativity on CBC television. Instantly, I was skeptical – another nativity production – why? Well I stuck with it and was happy I did.
I have to admit, I have always found the story of the virgin birth a difficult one to grasp. Of course our faith is built on so many truths we accept without understanding, but what I have always found difficult is how accepting Mary and Joseph were of their dreams. Can you imagine – “I had this crazy dream that I am to have a child and he will be the son of God.” “Really?!? Cool!” Would these revelations fly today? I can’t see it happening. We are so filled with mistrust and doubt.
What I loved about The Nativity; that had me spellbound within minutes, was the doubt and uncertainty of Mary and most especially Joseph, even after the angel had come and explained these things. This depiction of them helped me to relate to them better.
In this film, Mary goes to visit her pregnant cousin Elizabeth with disbelief and concern in equal measure. Elizabeth helps her to better understand the words of the archangel. When she returns home, visibly pregnant herself, the townspeople are horrified, they ridicule her. Joseph is shocked, hurt and bitter. Try explaining to a guy who is hurling furniture in anger – ‘It’s ok, this is the son of God.’ He wasn’t buying it.
In this movie, Joseph plans to leave; heading to Bethlehem for the census and Mary’s father begs him to take Mary with him, for her own protection. “She cannot stay here,” he tells Joseph, “she will be stoned to death.”
Grudgingly, Joseph takes her with him. But his anger does not even let him accept the words of the angel when he appears to sort things out for him. Finally, Jesus is born. Whose heart does not melt at the sight of a new born baby? And when the shepherd arrives, being told of this birth by…yes, an angel; and a short while later the wise men appear on the scene, Joseph is in awe of this child, and what all this attention means. He thinks back to what the angel told him…he believes.
Now, having been given the barest of facts related to Jesus’ birth, one can conjure up many interpretations of how the events unfolded. I like this particular portrayal, written by Tony Jordan for the BBC, because it portrays Mary and Joseph in ways I can truly understand – confused, frightened, questioning. Of course God chose them to be the earthly parents of Jesus because of their purity of heart, their devotion, their faith and willingness to do God’s will. But this contemporary slant on the nativity of Jesus helps me to understand how they may have reached acceptance. It does not diminish their stature in my eyes; rather their strength fills me with awe

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Advent Catholic family love

WAITING

Advent is a time of expectant anticipation.  But, oh, we are an impatient age.  Even those of us who are older, we are no longer content to wait for anything.  So what do we do with Advent?  Has it lost its significance in our lives?   We’re supposed to fill this time of waiting with prayer and reflection…but, if you’re like me, it’s filled with preparations for Christmas – and not so much for the blessed nativity, but in shopping, baking and the writing of Christmas cards.  How did this happen…and why?  It seems everything that humankind gets involved in becomes inflated and out of control.  Is it too late to turn this around?  Can we just decide to stop the madness and dole out lots of love and rejoice in the nativity of the Lord and call that Christmas?

Yes, we can…we don’t though, because there are children and grandchildren to consider.  But are we underestimating our offspring with that kind of thinking?  This past summer, both of our sons, along with their spouses, bought new homes.  They are busy with renovations and improvements and both families came to the conclusion that, since we would all be together at Christmas, wasn’t that gift enough?  Let’s get gifts for the children and let’s have our gathering together be gift for the rest of us.

I was actually the only one to protest – But can’t I knit things?

Oh yes, my daughters-in-law eagerly replied, but let’s not spend money on extravagant gifts.  That warmed my heart and gave me hope!

Let’s take time this Advent season, to consider what Christmas really means to us.  Let’s stop the madness where we can and fill these days with a bit of peace and joyful anticipation and preparation for the coming of our Lord!