April 2017 – Margery Frisch

Serving One Another

When I discovered my birthday fell on Easter Sunday this year, I felt it a great gift, because it wasn’t just any birthday, but a rather significant one. As the day crept closer, and neither of my kids stepped up to say, ‘Hey mom, since Easter Sunday is on your birthday (and a rather significant one at that), we’ll host Easter this year.’ This did not happen. Then my husband required surgery, with his recovery overlapping Easter. I knew he wouldn’t want to travel anywhere, so I stepped up and said that Easter would be at our house.

My youngest son seemed confused by this announcement, ‘But isn’t that what we normally do?’

‘Yes,’ I replied, calmly enough, ‘but Easter doesn’t normally fall on my birthday.’ Probably not so calmly with that last part. I must admit, I felt put upon.

You see, my father always made sure each of his seven children got special treatment on their birthdays. In fact, it was one of the spouses of one of my siblings who first observed that we McDonalds don’t really have birthdays…we have birth weeks! Now you see where I’m coming from.

So, that was the mindset leading up to Holy Week. And as that week progressed, I cleaned, I prepped and readied the house for our guests.

It was most fortunate that the beautiful liturgies of the Triduum preceded Easter Sunday, because those liturgies, and Fr. Kuzma’s homilies on service and humility, turned everything around for me. One day I grudgingly went about my preparations… and the next day I lovingly and joyfully went about doing what needed to be done. Just like that, I got over myself and looked forward to having everything just so when everyone arrived.

My daughters-in-law celebrate birthdays three and four days after mine and a granddaughter shares her mother’s birthday too. We celebrated Easter and four birthdays on Easter Sunday. My eldest son made an incredible birthday cake, everyone brought food and the day was glorious and special.

If we open our hearts and minds, God can help us to see beyond ourselves; can work with our imperfect souls in very special ways. If we open our hearts and minds everything changes – we change – for the good.

Not only that, but I still had six more days of my birth week, so it was indeed all good (and truly blest).

Keeping it Simple

When my husband and I were first married, I lovingly (and mistakenly) began the practice of bringing him coffee in bed each and every morning. It was a simple task, a small thing, but it meant a lot to him. It was easy. I smile now at the thought of how things…how life can begin simply enough and, over time, become more complicated. In those early days, when we were young and attractive, and love was new and easy, it was coffee, black – simple.

Over time, things change, we change – slowly, sometimes imperceptibly, but then you wake up one morning and a simple task you could once do in your sleep – coffee, black, changes to tea – carefully measured, steeped just so long, with this much sugar and a dash of milk. Life gets complicated. Do I ever complain? Sometimes. Would I stop performing this task? Never. Despite the changes over time, it is still done for the same reason – love. Sometimes I bring my husband’s tea, wake him gently, have a brief conversation, and then I go off for a run. It’s all good. But if I return an hour later and the tea is untouched, my husband is back in dreamland and he intends to travel with me to Owen Sound…well, that’s a different scenario entirely.

The beautiful thing about Lent is how it calls us to deeper prayer, increased alms-giving, with greater attention to others’ needs over our own; and a call to fast, to abstain. We set out on our Lenten journey with the best of intentions but sometimes life gets in the way and we are thrown off track. Our Lenten practice need not be complicated. We can begin in our very own homes, performing simple tasks with greater love and care. Fasting from angry words and quick tempered reactions. Little things like these spill over into our daily lives and beyond our homes. Sometimes we place heavy burdens on ourselves that we cannot keep up and rather than simplify the course of our Lenten journey – we give up. Never give up. Keep it simple. I’ve said it before – Jesus – Others – You. The proper perspective will bring you JOY through Lent!