February 2016 – Margery Frisch

Lenten Journey

Prayer, fasting and almsgiving can seem daunting to us as we begin our 40 days of Lent. And how does it feel right about now? Have you lost sight of your original intentions? Last year, a priest friend suggested we ‘give things up mindfully, not mindlessly.’ Those words continue to guide my Lenten journey and I’ve attempted to change things up a bit from my usual routine of ‘giving things up.’.

Prayer, for me, is the easy part. “Pray without ceasing,” St. Paul instructs us in 1 Thessalonians. Perhaps it is because I love solitude that I find this an easy practice. While driving my lengthy commute, walking, running even, I pray…rejoicing always and giving thanks. It is an enjoyable practice that can easily become a habit.

I read somewhere recently, that we must be careful of doing the right thing for the wrong reason. Fasting immediately came to mind. If I fast – is it to save money on food that can then be given to the local food bank, or am I depriving myself of food and secretly hoping to lose those pounds that have hung on since Christmas? There are numerous ways I can think of to fast, with no ulterior motive lurking in the shadows. We can fast from judging others; fast from anger, from complaining, and fast from thoughts of illness, trusting instead in the healing power of God.

Almsgiving is not necessarily a monetary thing. We all have too much stuff in our possession. We can purge those things we hoard, and give them to those who can make good use of them. I dropped in to Safe ‘N Sound recently – this is a local homelessness initiative – just to see what they’re all about. I was impressed with what I saw. They help the homeless, and those in danger of becoming homeless. They provide a comfortable spot to come in out of the cold, they provide a bit of lunch; a place to do laundry, take a shower and replace old and worn clothes with gently used clothing. There are computers available to search online for work and other resources, and overall the environment is warm and friendly. They are in constant need of towels, shampoo and conditioner, body wash, men’s and women’s deodorant. Gently used clothing, shoes and boots…it’s easy to help others by giving away those things we do not need; by doing without a few luxuries to purchase simple and much appreciated items of hygiene for those who can barely afford to feed themselves and their families.

Prayer, fasting and almsgiving can be accomplished in numerous ways. When we are mindful and grateful for the gifts we have been given, and when we are mindful of others’ needs and concerns, our Lenten journey will not be mindless drudgery, but fruitful and joy-filled.

Who Are You?

No seriously, who are you? Do you know? I was first a daughter and sister, then eventually sister-in-law, aunt, then came wife, mother, and in the wink of an eye mother-in-law, now happily grandmother! But who am I? I don’t think of myself as a writer, but I write. I laugh if called an athlete, but I run. I sing but I’m not a singer…I bring this up because sometimes I sit in church and wonder who I am and what I’m called to do. I hope I’m not alone in this.

I envy people who know, have always known, what they want to be; what they want to do in this life. Of all the jobs I’ve taken on, the one I feel I did well, the one I poured my heart and soul into was my role as mother. Not housewife, not cook, I was no June Cleaver and I think that stereo-type left a lot of women feeling inadequate. I talked myself (and lots of other women) out of such feelings with the columns I wrote when my kids were little. I’d take my kids to the park; we’d walk to the library; I’d sit on the floor and play with them; I’d sit on the floor and read to them. When naptime came, I didn’t scurry around cleaning or preparing dinner, as I was supposed to – I wrote at my electric typewriter – about feeling inadequate and disorganized and the women who read my column would laugh at my words and feel a little better about themselves as a result. I guess at that time, that’s what I was called to do. But our roles change as time goes on. I’m still a mother, but in a different capacity. Part of me does not feel the things that I do, the busyness of my days, defines who I am. And a lot of people might feel the same, but sit down in church sometime and contemplate this. What do you do? The women of our parish who weekly get together to do ‘Prayers and Squares,’ have a talent for sewing and create not just beautiful quilts, but awareness in us of those who are sick and in need of our prayers. And the joy they bring to those recipients of their handiwork cannot be measured. Does that not define, in part, who these women are?

Those in our church who raise funds for various organizations and the needs of others (the Knights of Columbus, the CWL and Catholic Charities most especially), have an energy and a passion that certainly defines them. Some tirelessly make meals for those in need; others put together groceries to give out in emergency situations. But it’s not just the assembling of food, there’s the purchasing, the carting of these foods, the hauling of these heavy bags. I marvel at you, because all of these things certainly define who you are…committed and caring, in mercy and justice. So, the next time you feel uncertain of who you are and what you are called to do, sit in church and contemplate those things that make up your day. You’ll be surprised to find the Lord is whispering in your ear and leading you to serve…in the direction of your talents.